….in a round about way 🙂
I just finished a fantastic book – Birth Matters by Ina May Gaskin. (I love her books and her Guide to Childbirth I refer to everone I know!) Chapter 7 is devoted to the dads! A paragraph on page 172 particularly stuck out to me:
“Our mainstream culture outlines a rather limited role for new fathers: the distibution of cigars to relatives and friends. We have also seen a role that is frequently shown on the television birth shows – father-to-be as photographer. I have observed (and have also heard several fathers report) that being the photographer of the labor and birth often has the effect of separating him from the feelings and the reality of the event. Maybe it feels safer for him at the moment, but while he may be happy to have a few photos, he often feels a sense of loss from having separated himself from the immediacy of this important event in his life. At any rate, this is something to think about. “
I’ll be the first to say, it is very easy to hide behind a camera, no doubt about it!!! After having my husband as the photographer for three births and hiring on the fourth, I can also say it’s much better to assign that job of photographing to someone other than Dad. Laboring Mama’s need their men.
Amen. This is SO completely true. I absolutely love that as a birth photographer I can take the role behind the lens and allow dad to be a part of the experience and connect with mom and baby. I love when birth photos show that dad was present and involved as a suport! Thanks for posting.
I have to put in a comment here because my husband was a great support for me during our labor with baby #2 and he also was the photographer because he wanted to be. He loved being able to capture the photos he wanted and it didn't take away at all from him being by my side. SO…I think it depends a lot on the person as well. I can DEFINITELY see the positives in having a birth photographer, but not everyone needs it to be able to serve the role as birth partner as well. Just a thought 🙂
Thanks for the other point of view Megan! I have also run into this as the doula, you know, how can I be the doula and photograph at the same time. It takes some juggling at times but it can be done! 🙂 It all depends on how the birth is going and how the mama is doing. I edited the post to include a little bit of this info, but Chris took pics at all of our births except the last one. I love the last birth so much more because of how involved Chris was (maybe the lack of midwife also played into this!) and I have birth pictures that include him! (He wasn't in any of the other ones). It's just kind of hard to take a good picture of yourself.